Feeling stuck is an indication that you believe most of your experiences are out of your control.
And you’re not completely wrong.
You see there are patterns to the way we think, feel and act and the more these patterns repeat, the stronger and therefore more automatic they are.
It’s super easy to be swept up in your patterns, routines, habits, and attitudes, and forget that you have a choice about all of it.
In fact, whether you realize it or not, you’re choosing all of it already.
Let me tell you a story about how a stuck attitude and a stuck light fixture got unstuck at the same time.
My home office has the same ceiling fan as the bedrooms and living room.
Because of this, my husband knew exactly how to change the light bulb when it went out in my office.
Only when he climbed on the chair to unscrew the glass cover and change the light bulb, it was stuck.
That first time he tried, he didn’t have time to figure out what was going on so he moved on. The next time he set out to change the light bulb he pushed and pulled a bit, he went to the living room and checked that fan (it worked just fine), he tried again, got frustrated and moved on.
On his third attempt, he enlisted Google and discovered that when the glass cover on this type of light fixture is stuck, it’s because it’s been overtightened. He found a couple of different suggestions, spent about 30 minutes trying them, got annoyed, and decided this room was just not going to have an overhead light.
One day, I’m resting on the couch in my office. My husband comes in to check on me (I had the flu) and decides to try changing the light bulb again.
I watch him climb up on the chair and push and twist the glass cover to the light fixture. His jaw is clenched, his shoulders are tense, and his head is shaking. I could tell the voice in his head was 100% sure the glass was stuck.
It was obvious to me that his attitude was stuck too. And I thought about a quote by Henry Ford:
“If you think you can or you think you can’t, you’re right.”
I suggested he try one particular suggestion he’d found on Google one more time.
But I challenged him to change ONE thing about this attempt. Instead of shaking his head while he worked, I challenged him to repeat the words, “This is going to work.”
He rolled his eyes and agreed.
He climbed onto the chair and began to recite, “This is going to work.”
Per the instructions he’d found online, he reached up with a towel in one hand, a rubber mallet in the other. “This is going to work.”
He held the towel on one part of the glass and tapped it with the mallet. “This is going to work.”
He worked his way around the glass. “This is going to work.”
Once all the way around, he set the towel and mallet down. “This is going to work.”
He reached up and pushed on the glass. “This is going to work.”
The glass twisted an inch and came right out.
Whether you realize it or not, you’re choosing to be stuck.
Here’s what to do about it—RESET.
If you reset a machine or device, you adjust or set it, so that it’s ready to work again. And what actually happens is junk information is cleared out so that good information is restored. (That’s not a technical description, but you get the gist.)
Without a reset, everything you do will be just like your past—stuck in old attitudes, beliefs, and patterns—which will result in endless repetitions of your life exactly as it is.
To reset right now, answer these questions:
- What is one way I’m stuck in my life?
- What is the thought that’s keeping me stuck?
- How can I change that thought with a simple mantra?
I challenge you to share your answers in the comments below. Declare your intention to get unstuck. I’ll help if you need it. I’ll commit to believing. This IS going to work.